I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
