after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize