I'm laying in your front yard are you home
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
