I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
