its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
