just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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