@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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