what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I look better un-naked...
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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