Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
