Dual....:-)
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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