is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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