then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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