scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
