yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
