she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
we're so committed to being not committed
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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