Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
