NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
