She announced her abortion via fbk
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
