How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
