question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
