The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
