who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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