STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
