somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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