I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
