I wanna bring you to show and tell
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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