Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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