I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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