Need sex. Gaining weight.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
