I'm going to rape someone's good day.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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