oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
