Nicole vs. Life
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
