Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He better not be in your backpack
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
