is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize