JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
