all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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