My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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