Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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