Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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