You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
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