I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
