An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
