I wish you could order shots online.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
