buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
