She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
we're so committed to being not committed
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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