look no pants
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
