I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize