Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
