Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
