Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
